Nobody said it was easy

Teaching in Korea was going along easier than I'd expected. I already had their respect- the children are 1/4 my age in a culture that celebrates Confucius' ideals (the main one being respect for elders). The students are all from affluent families and my school reflects this. The place is practically gold coated and has all the amenities an educator could ask for. The Korean teacher can speak English exceptionally well but management is limited in speech. This leads to much confusion in practical matters. Sometimes I feel like Leo Dicaprio in "Catch me if you Can." Improvisation is the utmost requirement here and I've always been pretty quick on my feet. Due to the lack of communication between teachers and administration, we are not held to the professional standards that many schools at home uphold. We are left with a great deal of freedom as to teaching method and such, but, that isn't to say we're not being watched. Every class is filmed and shown on TVs in the lobbies so parents can watch the educating take place, and they do. On top of that, my principal just announced that as of March 4th (the start of our new term) our school will be showing the classes live on the internet. (I will be sure to provide a link to the site when I figure it out). Then all of you can watch me work my inspirational magic; that's what I call it but it will probably resemble more of a clown at a birthday party. Yes, things were running smoothly until Friday when we welcomed 40 new students into Swaton. I was teaching at the tail-end of the school term and benefiting from all the English these children had learned the previous six months. I had no idea they come in here fresh (no English name, no alphabet, no colors, nothing). So when the door shut behind me and I stared into nine scared 4-year-old faces, I'm sure my face quickly contorted into a matching semblance of fear. My only goal for that hour was to teach them how to say, "my name is...." Easy enough except all Swaton students go by their English names and these kids had none. Most folks have to wait till they have one to be responsible for naming a person and I just stamped 16 kids new identities; pretty fuckin' cool. I sat with each one and read off names asking for a thumbs-up if they liked anything they heard but I realized I just as well could have been reciting the bible for all they understood. One kid, and it was really cute, couldn't hold his chubby head up and just continued to yawn with the droopiest face. I danced, made funny faces but I wasn't prepared to teach them this simple lesson. Halfway through the session, I gave up. I brought out crayons, paper and said, "let's color."